Ideas to incorporate on your day to make sure it feels completely and unapologetically yours.


  1. Get ready together- Lay to rest the superstition that you cannot see each other before you are married. Make coffee, put on music and dance in the kitchen, help each other get dressed and enjoy those quiet moments before the day begins.
  2. Write handwritten vows- Take the time to write down what you want to say to each other. Doesn't matter if its in a custom vow book or a napkin from the take out place from last night. They don't need to be perfect, the most meaningful vows usually aren't.
  3. Exchange letters- Write handwritten letters and exchange them during your first look or before the ceremony. You can even frame them later as a little mommento of the day.
  4. Have a first look- If you like the idea of the first look, find somewhere quiet and private. It can be in the trees, beside a barn or even a hallway outside your ceremony space, just make sure its just the two of you (and your photographer of course). This is where the emotions will start to hit and it is nice to have that time together.
  5. Bring something meaningful from home- Wear a piece of jewelry from a relative. Tuck a photo into your bouquet of someone who couldn't be there. Small details can carry enormous meaning.
  6. Have a picnic for two- Pack a charcuterie board and a bottle of wine and head off to a quiet place. Chinese takeout would even work as long as you get a chance to decompress together.
  7. Read your favorite poetry- Choose a poem or passage from a book that reminds you of your relationship. Sometimes, when we don't know how to express our feelings with our own words, someone else's can be helpful.
  8. Have a private first dance- you don't need a ballroom or a crowd. Put on your favorite song and just be together. Don't underestimate this, it often turns out to be some of the best parts to look back on fondly.
  9. Choose a meaningful location- Your location doesn't have to be the highest peak you can find. Maybe it is because that sense of adventure is a part of who you are as a couple (and that's great!) but it can also be your families property, where you had your first date, or someplace that just feels like home.
  10. Have a candlelit dinner- Whether its just you two, or a small group of those closest to you, a private chef, or a booth tucked away in the corner, slow down and have an intimate dinner.
  11. Make your favorite meal together- Cook breakfast together. Make pasta in your rented AirBnB. Build sandwiches for your picnic. Your wedding day doesn't have to be filled with traditional wedding activities.
  12. Turn your phones off- Give yourselves permission to be completely present. You don't have to document every second of your day, take a break and trust your photographer.
  13. Bring your pets- Let your dogs run amuk while you say your vows, then share your snacks with them. They are a part of your lives so why leave them at home?
  14. Create a time capsule- Write letters to your future selves to be opened on your one, five, ten, or twentieth anniversery. Add polaroids from the day, your vows, or a pressed flower you found on the hike.
  15. Take a walk together- You don't always need to be posing. Hold hands, talk normally, laugh, stop whenever you want. Some of the most beautiful moments happen when your just being yourselves.
  16. Bring a film camera or polaroid- give each other a disposable camera to document the day from your own perspectives. This is a rare opportunity to see yourself through your partners eyes and that will be something you treasure.
  17. Have a toast at sunset- Find somewhere quiet, pour a glass and just watch the sun disappear together. Say a few words to close out the day, or don't and just use it as a moment of peace.
  18. Stay somewhere special- It's not everyday that you get to go a little off the beaten path and justify staying in a castle or treehouse.
  19. Have an adventure after the ceremony- Especially if you picture a more traditional ceremony, use the rest of your time there to do something out of the norm. Jump off a dock into an alpine lake, take out the canoe, swim under a waterfall or something not related to water, I'm just spitballing here.
  20. Make the whole day about your relationship- There is nothing more romantic than planning a whole day of what you love to do together. If thats eating tacos from your favorite food truck, let's do it. If you love tattoos, post up in a local shop and get matching ones. If you ride horses, lets go out on your favorite trail and get a little sun burn. Do you love to go fishing together? Have a friendly (or not so much) competition, looser has to jump in.


Sometimes, I feel like a broken records, but I truly want you to know that your wedding day should feel like you. Reguardless of the backdrop, your favorite foods, inside jokes, traditions and intimacy are some things that will set your day apart. When you look back at the photos, you don't want to remember the prompt, you what to remember exactly how you felt in that moment.